“Show Me the Buddha!”

There’s a story from the Buddhist tradition in which an older monk asked his young disciple, “Would you like to see the Buddha?”

“Yes! Yes!” the monk answered excitedly. “Show me the Buddha!”

The older monk pulled a curtain aside and the young man found himself looking at a mirror.

In my coaching practice I’ve noticed that some, not all, of my clients are masters when it comes to inventing excuses as to why they can’t or don’t have everything they desire. Some, not all, are also really skilled at blaming other people for why they’re so unhappy.

“I couldn’t help myself.”

“My kids needed me.”

“I told Jim to handle it.”

“I had a horrible childhood.”

“I don’t get support from my husband (wife).”

“I don’t know how.”

The scary thing when I hear people making excuses or blaming others (including me) for what’s going wrong in their life, is that they believe what they’re saying. They think that they’re telling the truth.

If you’re going to have the very best life has to offer to you, you’re going to have to give up the excuses. You’re going to have to stop blaming others. You have to stop being a victim. You have to look into a mirror.


4 thoughts on ““Show Me the Buddha!”

  1. One word for you, Dearest Anthony: Surrender. Happened at the gym today without fanfare…just one word. I want to tell you I love you and thank you for all you do. My imagination: Washing feet.

    • YES! What a beautiful word to be given to you! Washing feet is one of my favorite images for what I do. I couldn’t be happier for you!

      Celebrating you in my prayers,

      • There is a little of God’s humor in the story. It is your particular two feet I was washing. You may not remember but I was HORRIFIED that you took off your shoes the first day I met you. And had all sorts of reactions to your feet ( embarrassed as I write) but the next two times I met with you you were wearing beautiful and elaborate shoes. I though God was playing a joke on me an you might have noticed in the sessions that I was staring at your feet! I’m very sorry I focused all my anger upon you. You explained that it was “water off a duck” but I’m sorry anyway. You’ve had a recent loss and you are a very kind sort of person. So after my sweaty exercise at the gym today I just put my head on the floor as always when I do my yoga stretches and there was the shift: surrender. And there was the image of washing your feet. I can’t say why but I feel so much better now, as if I have turned some kind of corner.

      • LOL Every once in a while, even when I’m working with someone repeatedly, I’ll unconsciously take my shoes off during a session. It’s something I learned to do 12 years ago. It allows the energy of the person I’m working with to flow through me me down into the ground.

        Speaking of twelve years ago, I was working with a woman who was raped by her grandfather while her mother and aunt watched. In her first session with me her anger came out in waves. Of course she wanted me to make the horrifying feelings she was experiencing go away, but I told her she needed to stay with them. Why? Well, for one thing, I’m not a therapist. Secondly, I told her, there’s a gift under all of that hurt.

        She eventually did discover the gift – a gift that she was meant to share with the world. That’s what happened with you. You have turned a corner.

        Go to the search button at the top right hand of the page and type in “Portia.” Read the poem that comes up. It’ll help you understand what happened.

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