I believe that there’s an unspoken epidemic that’s sapping people of the time and energy they need to nurture their dreams and realize their goals. It’s called, “people pleasing.”
I can’t begin to tell you how many of the people I work with who seem to have learned from an early age that pleasing others is a good way to receive validation or affection. By the time they come to see me it’s such a habit that when we talk about what they need to do, my suggestions have to go through a filter of thinking, “How can I do this for myself without letting others down?”
I know that I was guilty of this, especially in my twenties. I simply couldn’t imagine people I loved being able to take care of themselves and their own needs without me. What can I say? I was pretty arrogant.
I do my fair share of flying, enough to know that should the air bag come down for some reason, I’m supposed to put it on myself first, before worrying about the person next to me. My life changed for the better when I started taking care of myself first, and allowed people to take care of themselves. I can tell you, their lives changed for the better as well.
This week, instead of thinking of how you can “earn” the love of others by pleasing them, practice healthy self love and look for ways to please yourself.