Go Out On a Limb – Here’s Your Homework for this Week!

I’ve mentioned before that I always ask my coaching clients, “If you could change one thing in your life, what would it be?” Well, hopefully you’ve been doing the 90 Day Experiment with me (which is rapidly coming to a close) and you have one area in your life that you’ve been working on changing. Maybe it’s in your career, in your health, or your intimate relationships.

Now, write down three things you could do differently; what actions could you take that would not be in your comfort zone that would produce incredible results? For example, you may need to ask for help. Do you need to hire a coach or start having a framework of accountability in place?

Finally, ask three people this week whose opinion you respect, and ask them how they’d go about achieving your goal. Since it’s not their goal, they might have detached  insight that’s valuable for you.

Give up your old attitudes, excuses, reasons, and embrace new ways of doing things. That’s how breakthrough results will start happening for you.

Success Story – “I know I can do this.”

This was in the  “Comments” section of my last post. It’s from Melanie Blystra.

I am doing something I normally wouldn’t do. I am a party planner. I learned from my grandma Harris, who was the best. I love [emphasis mine, Anthony] to plan parties and the people I work for, Stephanie and her husband, know it because I put their wedding reception together and several birthday parties. So Friday night Stephanie’s husband called me and asked me to do him a favor…he asked me how much it would be to make invitations for a friend at work. I gave him a quote for the invitations and the next thing I knew I am planning a birthday party for his friend that I never met…it just kind of fell into my lap and I was like “AHHHHHH!”, but with all the practice I’ve had with doing it for my friends and family, I know I can do it for this person. I am creeping just a little bit farther out of that shell I’ve been hiding in. It is kind of weird planning a party for a person I don’t know and have only spoken to once on the phone, but I’m ready for the challenge [emphasis mine, Anthony]! Why just stop at making the cards for the party right?
Love you Anthony!

Melanie, I couldn’t be happier for you! Keep shining your light!

I love you more,

Anthony

Going Out On a Limb

Last week I asked you to take a look at the reasons (excuses) that you’re using to keep yourself safe, and small. In order to move up to the next level in your life, you’re going to have to face your fears, and risk looking foolish, making a mistake, or asking for help. You have to go out on a limb, that’s where the fruit is.

Do you tend to talk yourself out of doing what you know deep down inside you need to do to have the success, fulfillment, intimacy or passion you want? Not taking risks virtually guarantees that you’ll probably continue to create the same, predictable, results you’ve had up until now.

I had a rough time today.

Steve Massing (http://themassings.net/sitesbysteve/) has been working with me on what I’d like my new website to look like. He sent me a few examples to look at and I picked one of them. He’s working really hard to get my site up in the shortest time possible.

For my part, I’m writing, writing, writing. Throwing away what I’ve written, and writing more. Today I finally settled on the content of one of the ebooks I’m writing. How do I know? Because I fought like hell not to write about it! I went back to what I teach my clients all of the time – what you resist the most, is what you need to do the most.

When I finally gave in, surrendered, I felt like hell, like a truck ran me over. I had no energy, and felt somewhat depressed. I went to the grocery, and my groceries were rung up before I realized I didn’t have my wallet on me. I bought one of those “refrigerator boxes” filled with sodas, and when I picked it up, the box tore and cans spilled out all over the floor of the store. I sighed, knowing that people behind me weren’t exactly happy with me, picked the cans up and told the cashier that I’d be back with my wallet – as soon as I returned from driving home and getting it.

The lousy feeling, and everything that happened while I was going through it meant that old beliefs were dying away in the face of my new intention.

Reasons or Results? – Here’s Your Homework for this Week.

In my coaching practice, one of the first things I ask is, “If you could change one thing in your life, what would it be?”

Think about an area of your life that you wish were different. What could you have in your life that would make you excited to wake up in the morning?

Once you have an answer, make a list of the reasons you haven’t been able to create the results you desire.

Look at the list, and ask yourself, “Is this true? Or is this an excuse? Have I given up my power to have what I want by making someone else responsible for my happiness?”

Now, ask yourself these questions:

How long have I believed this to be true?

What will my life look like in 5, 10, or 20 years if I don’t give up this excuse, or stop blaming others for what’s happening in my life?

If my life depended on it, would I be willing to stop using this excuse, or stop the blame game? (By the way, your life does depend on it.)

Whatever it is that you want to change in your life, you have to become more committed to that vision, than your excuses. This week, understand that when you stop believing your reasons, you start seeing different results.

“Show Me the Buddha!”

There’s a story from the Buddhist tradition in which an older monk asked his young disciple, “Would you like to see the Buddha?”

“Yes! Yes!” the monk answered excitedly. “Show me the Buddha!”

The older monk pulled a curtain aside and the young man found himself looking at a mirror.

In my coaching practice I’ve noticed that some, not all, of my clients are masters when it comes to inventing excuses as to why they can’t or don’t have everything they desire. Some, not all, are also really skilled at blaming other people for why they’re so unhappy.

“I couldn’t help myself.”

“My kids needed me.”

“I told Jim to handle it.”

“I had a horrible childhood.”

“I don’t get support from my husband (wife).”

“I don’t know how.”

The scary thing when I hear people making excuses or blaming others (including me) for what’s going wrong in their life, is that they believe what they’re saying. They think that they’re telling the truth.

If you’re going to have the very best life has to offer to you, you’re going to have to give up the excuses. You’re going to have to stop blaming others. You have to stop being a victim. You have to look into a mirror.

Preparing for Launch

I love setting new intentions at the first of every month. Today I set the intention of keeping my sanity over the next few weeks!

On January 1st, I started a 90 Experiment with the intention of expanding my coaching practice (which I started the next day). I had no clue as to how I was going to do it. Literally. But I started doing what I’ve been teaching. I started visualizing how many clients I wanted on a weekly basis, what I was going to charge, the income I wanted, etc. for forty days.

Things were rough as they are when starting any new business. My clairvoyant clients stopped seeing me, which meant that my income … well, you can imagine what happened to my income. But I kept plugging on, visualizing, asking afformations, etc. Honestly, it was a scary time. Soon though, I started picking up coaching clients. I taught them what I’ve been writing about on this site (personalized to their situation) and they saw results, and quickly.

Still, I felt as though I wasn’t on the “right track.” I couldn’t shake the feeling I wasn’t doing something right. A series of synchronicities led to me being asked to review a book by Brendon Burchard. Once I read it, I knew where I was off track. I as doing everything bass ackwards when it came to building my practice.

I took action on what I read, and I’m excited to announce that Steve Massing will be helping me build my new website! Steve has forgotten more than I’ll ever know about this sort of thing. Of course, that’s only the beginning!

On February 1st, I started a new 90 Day Experiment with the intention of writing an ebook. Well, now it looks as though I’ll be writing two. One of the things I learned from Bruchard is that I even made that harder than it needed to be. And I have to do all that while writing more content for the book I wrote which Fourth Dimension Press has bought for publication!

I can’t tell you how excited I am looking forward to the big changes I’m anticipating. The moral of my story is that I’m no different than you. I wanted to make a change in my life, and I didn’t know the how but I did know the why. It may be a cliche, but if I can do it, you can too!

For more information about Steve Massing, or to contact him to inquire about creating a website for you, please go to http://themassings.net/sitesbysteve/.