Healthy Self Love, cont.

I believe that there’s an unspoken epidemic that’s sapping people of the time and energy they need to nurture their dreams and realize their goals. It’s called, “people pleasing.”

I can’t begin to tell you how many of the people I work with who seem to have learned from an early age that pleasing others is a good way to receive validation or affection. By the time they come to see me it’s such a habit that when we talk about what they need to do, my suggestions have to go through a filter of thinking, “How can I do this for myself without letting others down?”

I know that I was guilty of this, especially in my twenties. I simply couldn’t imagine people I loved being able to take care of themselves and their own needs without me. What can I say? I was pretty arrogant.

I do my fair share of flying, enough to know that should the air bag come down for some reason, I’m supposed to put it on myself first, before worrying about the person next to me. My life changed for the better when I started taking care of myself first, and allowed people to take care of themselves.  I can tell you, their lives changed for the better as well.

This week, instead of thinking of how you can “earn” the love of others by pleasing them, practice healthy self love and look for ways to please yourself.

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Healthy Self Love

I just read a great post in Melanie Blystra’s blog in which she talks about buying beautiful roses for herself. She said she doesn’t know what came over her.

I know what’s going on. It’s called, “healthy self love.” That’s what the point of this blog has really been about.

What I love about Melanie’s story is that she’s extremely shy, and at the start of her 90 Day Experiment, she made the intention of making her beautiful handmade cards into a business, which she did. Recently, she had an opportunity to become a professional party planner, which she took advantage of. Now, she’s buying herself flowers.

I also want to acknowledge Marian Kramer, who made a comment on one of my posts that she’s hearing herself laugh again.

Laughter is the outward sign of inward hope. Healthy laughter is another sign of self love.

What sign(s) are you showing yourself? Let me know. I’d really love to hear your story.

You can read Melanie’s blog post by going here, http://pupkinstuff1027.wordpress.com/2011/04/16/something-for-me/.